Discussion Questions
for High Hopes
1. In Chapter One how did you feel or what did you think when Anne walked out of the classroom and decided she was never going back?
2. Did you learn anything about inpatient psychiatric treatment by reading about Anne’s stays at Sheppard Pratt?
3. Do you know of anyone who chose to cope with severe depression in an unexpected and unorthodox way like Anne did when she decided to go to Australia?
4. Anne travelled alone as sixty-year-old woman. What are your thoughts about her experiences as a solo traveler?
5. Anne was embarrassed to tell people that she was traveling alone across the world to see Bruce Springsteen. She thought people would think she was pathetic because she had nothing better to do with her life than chase an again rock star. Have you ever done something that you felt people would look down on you for, but done it anyway?
6. How did you feel when you read that Anne’s friend did not want to hear about her experiences in Australia, and that they did not want to see her as a person with positive energy. They were only interested in seeing her as a depressed person.
7. Have you ever had to deal with jet lag? How did you deal with it? What did you think about Anne’s getting to Australia and jumping on an exercise bike before even going to her room?
8. How did you feel when Anne went running to The E Street Band members in the first hotel to ask for selfies? Were you surprised?
9. Anne writes that she did not want to meet Bruce Springsteen in person because she did not want to be disappointed to learn that his real persona was less than the persona he has onstage. Anne writes that it would have been difficult for her to continue following Bruce Springsteen if she learned that he was not a good person. Have you ever been inspired by someone and that found out that they were not who you thought they were?
10. What do you think about Anne’s meeting Barbara Carr and the impact their conversation had on Anne’s ideas about her relationship with her son?
11. What do you think contributed to Anne’s acquiring a positive ball of energy for the first time in her adult life, during her trip?
12. What was your reaction to Dr. Bhati’s asking Anne to tell him a story from her trip and then wanting to give her a sedative after she told him one?
13. In an effort to keep her positive ball of energy alive when she returned from Australis, at a silent auction, Anne bid on and won the opportunity to co-host an E Street Radio. She then found out that the host was mean and dismissive. Did you think this would cause Anne to become depressed thinking that he would tear her to shreds on the air? Were you surprised that she decided that knowledge is power and that her best hope for surviving the show was to learn all she could? Have you ever been in a similar adversarial situation?
14. Do you think Anne would have been able to maintain her positive energy and self-respect if she had not severed relationships with Dr. Bhati and her many other friends?
Discussion Questions
for Mattie, Milo, and Me
- Considering Anne’s decision to keep Milo – what would you have done? Is there a point where you would have given up or taken a different path?
- What do you think about Anne’s need to replace Mattie immediately to offset falling into a depression? Do you think she acted too hastily? Do you think it was okay that she got another dog so quickly even though her children said they were not ready for a new dog?
- If a child wants a dog, and their parent does not want a dog, what do you think is the right thing for the parent to do? What do you think about Anne’s method of substituting a series of reptiles and amphibians?
- When Anne met “mellow Milo,” and he was so calm, do you agree with Anne that Bill Smith at Main Line Animal Rescue had likely sedated Milo with medication? If so, was this a justifiable method to use to place a difficult dog like Milo with a family?
- What do you think about how the community of dog people rallied to support Anne and Milo? One example is in the beginning, when Anne was struggling with Milo, and Jane and Mary stepped in to help. A second example is when Anne needed surgery part way through dog school and they stepped in, again. Have you experienced something similar in your own life?
- When Anne and her family met with Gail for their dog school interview with Milo, do you believe Gail was right that Milo was well-behaved during the interview because he knew what was happening and that he was “internally stressing”?
- Do you think Gail’s advice to return Milo to the rescue was good advice? Do you think Gail should have been more open to hearing Anne’s concerns about Milo and the behaviors she wanted help with? Do you think Gail should have been more empathetic about the situation and less hasty to decree that Milo should be returned to the rescue?
- Do you think that Tiny’s death led to Anne’s not wanting a dog? Or do you think that many people do not want dogs for many reasons, such as shedding, the need to walk them and that the moms are often left with the chores that children promise to do before the dog arrives?
- The morning after Milo died, when Anne met Bill Smith at Main Line Animal Rescue, were you surprised that she felt no anger toward Bill even though she believed he had sedated Milo a decade earlier?
- Milo’s death was not as sudden as when Mattie was killed by the UPS truck. What did you think Anne would do about adopting another dog after he died?
- What do you think about how Anne’s mother treated Anne and Anne’s children? What makes a mother cold and aggressive?
- Consider the many scenes at dog school. What do you think about how Mary conducted the training of the dogs and their moms. If you have a dog, would you take your dog to this dog school for lessons and classes?
- After Mattie was killed do you think Anne should have called UPS and asked for a new driver? If you were Anne, would you harbor a grudge against the UPS man who killed Mattie? Or would you forgive him?
- Reflecting on the multiple dogs in this memoir – beginning with Mattie, then Milo, and then Yat (renamed Ryan ) and Sam – which dog or dogs would you adopt? How would you take care of them with their varying needs and personalities?
- Comment on the phrase, “Love is not a pie.” Is this metaphor always true, sometimes true or never true? What are some examples that support your position on this?
- Consider the moral dilemma between getting a dog from a reputable breeder versus getting a dog from a reputable rescue. How does a responsible prospective dog adopter consider the moral aspects of this decision?
- Were you surprised by Anne’s decision to take not just one but two rescue dogs after Milo’s death? Please explain why or why not.
- The theme of empathy is an important part of this memoir. Can you identify key points where empathy changes the course of the story? Or where the absence of empathy also has an impact?
- What are the main take-away lessons from this memoir that will stay with you?
- Do you think it was irresponsible of Anne to take Milo to Bed Bath & Beyond to try to desensitize him to people, given her lack of experience training dogs and that she had no way of knowing whether or not he would attack someone or if she would be able to control him?
- Do you agree with Anne that because she did not make Milo do the usual commands before she gave him his bone before her workout, she was responsible for him biting her? Would you be able to love a dog who attacked you?
- Do you think Anne was irresponsible for keeping Milo as a family pet, even though with all his training and behavior management, he occasionally bit her and her husband? He could have bitten anyone who came into the house.
- When Milo chases the kite in the sound in North Carolina what did you think was going to happen when he spotted the family having a picnic on the beach?